Weekend Worship—Beneath the Cross

Last Easter I found myself huddled beneath the cross where Jesus hung dying.

Now, for those of you that know me, that’s not as strange as it seems. I love the theater; I even majored in costume design for a time in college. But now, my favorite theater is found in the church. I love being involved in church dramas. For me, the Bible comes alive when it’s being portrayed on the stage.

I do have to confess that I don’t like being one of those onstage – hence the major in costume design. I absolutely hate being in front of a large group of people. I’ve found my place, though. I love being part of the stage crew and that’s what I was doing last Easter.

So, last Easter I huddled beneath the cross while Jesus hung suffering. I was dressed all in black, trying to make myself as small as possible so I wouldn’t detract from the actor portraying Christ. But as I crouched there, I heard his groans and watched him writhe in agony. I heard the cry of the crowds and felt my heart chilled by their impassive faces as they observed the drama.

Was this the way it had been 2000 years ago? The question in my mind transported me to ancient Jerusalem as my heart flooded with parallels. It was no longer just a drama on stage, Jesus’ agony and sacrifice became real in a way I could never have imagined.

The black I wore represented my sin and my invisibility to God in my wretchedness.

My silence, while necessary and expected during the performance, stung me with the resemblance of real life. The world expects me to be silent about the cross, or at least tasteful. And so often I comply, remaining quiet instead of speaking out.

Finally my attempt to remain hidden reminded me that while the world might not see me as I really am, Jesus had a perfect view of me while he hung suffering.

Yes, last Easter I found myself huddled at the base of the cross where Jesus hung dying.

And I will never be the same.

Weekend Worship—A Weight Loss Journey

I've been on a journey of sorts for the past few years—a quest to change my lifestyle. It’s involved the usual—eating better, losing weight and exercising. It’s been an incredibly slow process and I think if I’d known exactly how slow, I might not have attempted it. But it has been marked with steady progress. And I’m well on my way to being half the woman I used to be!

Not long ago, while several of us were having lunch, a close friend showed me just how much progress I’d made. The question came up during lunch about how much weight I’d lost.

“I’ve lost 86 pounds so far, but I’ve still got 31 pounds to go to get to my goal.”

“Wow.”

Then came the inevitable follow up questions.

“How long has it taken you?”

“Do you have any before pictures?”

There was a time I wouldn’t have shared any pictures of myself—especially when I was at my heaviest. But now, those pictures are proof of the changes that have occurred in my life. I feel so much better physically—after all I was carrying what equaled an average 13 year old on my back. And, everyone could clearly see I wasn’t the person I used to be.

As I passed around the pictures I couldn’t help but think about Pilgrim’s Progress, the classic by Paul Bunyan. I love that allegory—especially the part where Christian is carrying the burden of sin. It’s such a visible picture of who we are in Christ, as opposed to who we were before.

I began to wonder how I’m doing in that area. Sure, I’ve shed excess physical pounds, but God is much more interested in my heart. Am I walking in freedom or am I weighed down with pounds of unconfessed and unconfronted sin? Can people see evidence of Christ in my life—or does my sin obscure His presence?

I’ve decided that as Easter approaches I’ll spend as much energy getting into shape spiritually as I have physically. Then, hopefully the changes you see will be even more pronounced!


There is no soundness in my flesh because of Your indignation; There is no health in my bones because of my sin. For my iniquities are gone over my head; As a heavy burden they weigh too much for me. Psalm 38:3-4