Life Lessons—Feel the Fear, and Do It Anyway!

A guest post by Reba J Hoffman

Don't abandon your dreams

Several years ago, I had big dreams but when it came to acting on them, I was terrified. I didn’t believe in myself and I had a lot of people who provided daily doses of negative reinforcement. It seemed I would move forward to the point where the adrenaline kicked in and my hands began to shake. Then I did what I’d done over and over again. I quit. I ran in the opposite direction, all the while kicking myself in the seat of the pants for abandoning my dream.

When I got tired of being stuck in the quagmire, I reached out. I found a book that revolutionized my life. Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway by Dr. Susan Jeffers. Before I read the book, when I got to the fear, I concluded I lacked courage and gave up. It resulted in dream paralysis.

I want you to learn from my adventure through the valley of fear. Here are a few things I learned that I believe will encourage you:

• Fear is NOT a lack of courage. When you feel the fear, it just means your body is reacting naturally to an uncertain situation. God created us that way. 

• Feeling the Fear and doing it anyway is rarely fatal. Disclaimer for high octane thrill seekers: my dreams were not to jump out of an airplane at forty thousand feet without a parachute or climb Mount Everest without ropes. Moving forward won’t kill you, no matter how bad your palms sweat. 

• You will have discomfort whether you push forward or run away. So, if you’re going to feel that way, why not do what you want to do?! 

• If you move forward in spite of the fear, your sense of empowerment and confidence will multiply. You will find more courage, wisdom and passion for your dream. And, you’ll become more productive at working toward living your dream. 

Run toward your dream, not away from it!

You will get used to the fear and it won’t bother you as much. Just like when your stomach growls when you’re hungry or your eyelids droop when you’re sleepy, you’ll come to expect and automatically accept the temporary state of fear, knowing that as soon as you take action, the fear will subside.

My life has not been the same since I made the personal commitment to feel the fear, and just do it anyway. Yours will change too. When you’re terrified, RUN! Just run in the direction of your dream instead of away from it. It will make all the difference in your world.

What are your fears? What’s kept you from living your dream? Leave a comment here. 

Reba J. Hoffman

Reba J. Hoffman is the founder and president of Magellan Life Coaching (www.magellanlifecoaching.com). She holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Counseling and is a natural encourager. She serves as Member Care Coach for My Book Therapy and is the author of Dare to Dream, A Writer’s Journal. You can connect with Reba through her motivational blog, Finding True North, or by email at reba@magellanlifecoaching.com. You can also follow her on Twitter at @RebaJHoffman.

Life Lessons—Emotionally Involved

Guest post by Reba Hoffman

As writers, you spend a whole lot of time creating characters and walking with them through all sorts of trials. The same thing that makes a compelling story for the reader can cause all sorts of challenges for you the writer. Why? Because you are emotionally involved.

The more time you spend with your characters, the more of yourself you have invested in them. And, because you experience their tragedies with them, your emotions can be affected.

It’s a great thing—even necessary—that you are so connected with those you create and write about. It’s what makes you a great writer. But, it also places you in a place of emotional vulnerability. Here’s how it may show up.

Feeling blue or even depressed after writing a negative emotional scene. You may react just like if your best friend suffered the same scenario as your characters. Remind yourself it’s only fiction.

Feeling fear if your character is being stalked or if they are attacked. Prove to yourself you are safe by walking around your environment that is free from those who would want to harm you.

Feeling abandoned by your characters when you write “The End”. As crazy as it sounds, just as readers feel a sense of loss at the end of a really good book, so can the author. The best way to overcome this is to immediately start developing your next book.

These and other emotions are common to writers. If you’re not expecting them, they can sideline you. But if you understand what’s happening, you can combat them. You’ll be able to write a compelling story with amazing characters without suffering emotional fallout yourself.

The deep emotions that you experience are just one of the incredible gifts you have that will make your character resonate. And your readers will throw down the greenbacks to purchase your books. Due care with your own emotions will keep you healthy and writing for years to come.

Have you ever felt gripped by emotions while writing? Why not share it here?

Reba J. Hoffman is the founder and president of Magellan Life Coaching (www.magellanlifecoaching.com).  She holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Counseling and is a natural encourager. She serves as Member Care Coach for My Book Therapy and is the author of Dare to Dream, A Writer’s Journal. You can connect with Reba through her motivational blog, Finding True North, or by email at reba@magellanlifecoaching.com. You can also follow her on Twitter at @RebaJHoffman.