Finding Power When We Find our Point of Difference and Write From There

by Sarah Sally Hamer @SarahSallyHamer

No matter what we write, no matter who we are, there is a point of difference between us and every other writer and, ultimately, between every other person. This is an amazing part of the What is our point of difference? It's what makes us who we are, it's our core, our belief system, the way we express ourselves, and the things we write about. It's the part that makes us real. 

It also directly affects what we write and how we do it. 

Consider this: Jane Austen wrote stories about the time she lived, when women were very concerned about finding young, wealthy, unmarried men. Especially if a "gentleman's daughter" had no appreciable dowry and no commercial skills to support herself, marriage was almost the only way to support herself. The few other viable choices were to become a governess or the poor sister/aunt who helped support the household by taking on chores which would usually be done by a servant. 

Austen's writing reflects that. Yes, she also talks about the human condition in delightful and heartfelt ways—I love the way she clothes the all-too-imperious Mr. Collins in a sense of self-righteous buffoonery. Her doomed love affair with Tom Lefroy may also have had an affect (they not allowed to marry since neither of them had money) on her stories. She certainly was able to create stories that resonate through the years.

Mark Twain also wrote stories about his time and experiences. They are visceral, sometimes ugly, representations of what life was like in the southern United States in the mid-1800s. Even though we now certainly have different sensibilities and ideas about how people should be treated, the way of life in that time period was normal for them. Twain's country "twang" and vivid descriptions are deftly and brilliantly part of both his world and his point of difference, since no one else could tell the stories he told.

What is your point of difference? What aspects of life belong only to you? How can you express them?

• Be honest, with yourself and others. We each have our story to tell.

• Don't try to write like someone else or tell the next "Harry Potter story." It's already been told by someone who had her own point of difference. Your story is about you and your life.

• Be authentic. Some of our stories are about deep, dark wounds of the heart. Telling them, even through a character's eyes, can be painful, dragging up old memories. But, ultimately, they can also be very cathartic and help us to heal.

• Find your inner boldness and strength. You have both and they need encouragement and support to thrive.

• Don't let anyone talk you out of your point of difference. It belongs to you and you alone. No matter who tells you differently. Not everyone will like it, or will support you in it, but it's yours to use, abuse, or choose not to use. 

Finally, just write. Over and over. Whether what you write is "commercial" or not. Write what you really feel. Allow yourself to find that point of difference, the one that is truly unique to you, and hold on to it with all your fingers and toes. Your words will finally find their voice and, you will be amazed and humbled by how brilliant you really are.

What is your point of difference? What makes you unique?

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Sarah (Sally) Hamer, B.S., MLA, is a lover of books, a teacher of writers, and a believer in a good story. Most of all, she is eternally fascinated by people and how they 'tick'. She’s passionate about helping people tell their own stories and has won awards at both local and national levels, including two Golden Heart finals.

A teacher of memoir, beginning and advanced creative fiction writing, and screenwriting at Louisiana State University in Shreveport for over twenty years, she also teaches online for Margie Lawson at www.margielawson.com and for the No Stress Writing Academy at https://www.worldanvil.com/w/classes-deleyna/a/no-stress-writing-academy. Sally is a free-lance editor and book coach, with many of her students and clients becoming successful, award-winning authors. 

You can find her at info@mindpotential.org