4 Tips for Going the Distance in Writing (and in Marriage)

by Lori Hatcher

Forty years ago today, I walked down the aisle with a bouquet of bridal shower bows practicing for my wedding. My soon-to-be husband, David, standing at the altar, grinned so big his eyes turned into tiny slits. With the naivete of youth and the faith of children, we were twenty-four hours away from committing our lives to each other forever.

In sickness and in health (yep). In poverty and in wealth (still waiting on the wealth part). Forsaking all others (yes and amen). ‘Til death do us part.

So far, so good.

Occasionally younger friends will ask us what’s the secret to staying married. It occurred to me today that some of the advice we share applies to the writing life, too. 

4 Tips for Going the Distance in Writing (and in marriage)

1. Don’t quit.

Seriously?

Seriously. 

Whether God has called you to marriage or to writing, don’t be quick to look for a reason to quit. Both are holy callings. He has a plan and a purpose for your marriage and your words or He wouldn’t have given them to you. He intends to use them to lighten someone’s load, cheer their heart, or lead them to salvation. Don’t miss the joy of serving Him by quitting. Forty years from now, you’ll be glad you persevered.

2. Put God first.

Marriage can quickly turn from being an illustration of God’s committed love to becoming “all about me.” The writing life can also seem like a me-first business. Build a platform. Build a brand. Build a tribe.

Putting God first in writing can seem counterintuitive. Read my Bible and pray before I jump into the pressing deadlines? Connect that writer friend with a publisher because she has the skills they’re looking for, not me? Share that post or article someone else wrote because it will point people to God and bring Him glory?

Yes and yes. The business of Christian writing (and Christian marriage) isn’t one of self-exaltation. It’s one of self-abasement. As John the Baptist, the one whom Jesus said was “none greater,” (Matthew 11:11) said, “He (Jesus) must increase, but I must decrease” (John 3:30). 

In the upside-down nature of God’s kingdom, He who humbles himself will be exalted (James 4:10). Most importantly, God is glorified.

3. Put another before yourself.

As in marriage, the Christian writing life isn’t about putting ourselves first. My friend Vonda Skelton once said, “We’re the only business where we train our competition, because it’s not competition. We’re all on the same team. When one wins, we all win.” 

My friend Cindy Sproles said, “The world is big enough and broken enough to need all of us, sharing our words and pointing people to Jesus.”

In marriage and in writing, when we work as a team, helping each other fulfill the calling God has placed upon our lives, God is glorified and others are drawn closer to Him.

4. Don’t forget to have fun.

Sometimes I get so busy about the business of Christian writing (and being married) that I forget to have fun. When this happens, it’s time to revisit what made me fall in love with my calling (and my spouse).

Did you start out writing poetry? Newspaper articles? Devotional pieces? Why not pull out a pen and dabble? Or try something you’ve never tried before: flash fiction or fantasy. Even if the result isn’t publishable, the creative experience can recharge your energy and make you smile. Take your writing (and your spouse) on a date every now and then, just for fun.

Tomorrow, December 28, we’ll open Apple Music and play the songs friends sang at our wedding. We’ll laugh about how we cleaned rice out of the car for months afterward. And we’ll thank God for His kindness and mercy in not only bringing us together but keeping us together.

We’ll promise anew not to quit, to put God first, to put each other ahead of ourselves, and remember to have fun. 

I’ll do the same for my writing life, because I’m in this for a lifetime.

How about you?

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4 Tips for Going the Distance in Writing (and in Marriage) from Lori Hatcher on @EdieMelson (Click to Tweet)

Lori Hatcher is a writing instructor, freelance editor, and author of six devotional books with Our Daily Bread Publishing. She loves to share tips and tricks that make authors’ lives easier with local writers groups and at conferences. One of her favorite workshops is “20 Writing Life Hacks, How to Write Better, Faster, Smarter.” Connect with her next at Carolina Christian Writers Conference and Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference.