Tuesday, November 10, 2020

How a Writer Overcomes Discouragement


by Cindy Sproles @CindyDevoted

There’s not an author around who hasn’t experienced it. Not one. From the most prolific writer to the newest beginner. Every single one has fought discouragement on some level—be it a critique partner/group, a paid critiquer, or a bad article/book review. None of us are immune.

It is important to remember that your outlook on any situation will help you overcome the rough spots, then remember most of the discouragement writers face is not directed personally at you. Many times we end up in the right place at the wrong time and that places us in the line of fire.

Writing is not an easy profession. Like professional acting, there is a great amount of desire to grab the few slots available that will sail us into publication. This is why it is so important your head and your heart are on the same page.

I wish I could tell you there is a reason why someone—even an industry professional, would choose to rake an author over the coals for a work in progress. Especially, when most of the time, their job is to be kind, encourage, and direct an author’s writing. Still, there are horror stories of folks just being mean.

My friend and I were asked to proctor a “First Page” class where two industry publishers would read the first page of their work and critique it in front of the class. My friend chuckled and said, “This is a disaster waiting to happen.” And he was right. Several folks volunteered their first page to be reviewed in the class and what should have been a polite learning session became a free-for-all against the poor authors who were brave enough to share. It was so bad, that at the end of the session, my friend politely thanked the participants and the class and then remarked, “There are counselors at the back of the room for those of you who have been traumatized.” It was terrible. We spent some time afterward reassuring these folks their writing was not that bad. It wasn’t! There simply wasn’t a good excuse for why these publishers felt it necessary to turn a learning session into a massacre. 

Those folks were disappointed, even broken after they’d stepped forward to volunteer their work. I’d dare not say, some walked away from writing completely. 

This is why I love the Christian market. Editors, authors, and publishers spend an immense amount of time with authors at conferences and each one has the attitude, “There is room for us all.” They desire to gently guide, direct, and teach new and seasoned writers to what the industry is looking for so they can reach their goals of publication.

Still, your attitude toward your work is vital. Take these steps to heart as you write so that you are prepared for the things that could happen. 

These tools will help toughen your skin and soften your heart.

It’s not personal: It’s like the cranky coworker that jumps you at the office leaving you standing in a puddle of tears. You truly don’t know what happened to them before they came to work that day. It could be family issues, finances, fear. You just don’t know. But give grace, even when it hurts. Galatians 5 reminds us, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” Don’t carry your feelings on your shoulder, but strengthen your stance with the confidence that God has gifted you with the desire to write. Remember, He will not send you out without preparing you. Consider the harshness the prod that spurs you to better your work, then shake it off and move ahead. Love those cranky folks, anyway.

Continue to learn the craft: Spend time reading and studying the craft of writing. Attend conferences. Listen to writers podcasts, purchase conference MP3s or CDs. LEARN. The more you read, the more you study, the better equipped you are to write at a higher level. 

Consider rejections rungs on the ladder: Never look at rejection as a bad thing, instead, look at it as a rung on the ladder to success. You made it to the first rung and learned. To the second rung, and learned. On and on, until your work reaches the level that publishers are searching for. Rejections are never bad. They are simply tools to help us learn and better ourselves.

Don’t mope: Give yourself a ten-minute pity party and then buck up and move ahead. Success does not happen sitting in the mud puddle. It happens when you stand up, wipe the mud off your face, and stomp right on through. Besides, stomping in mud puddles is fun. Surely you remember this as a child? Sometimes, we fail to remember the childlike attributes that encourage us to drive ahead. 

Remember: God continually asked the Israelites to REMEMBER. Wear the word on their foreheads, on their door mantles. He wanted them to remember all he’d done for them so they were encouraged to know He would never leave them. When the time comes for you to stand in the position to critique others, then remember. Recount the times others shared great words of encouragement to help you move ahead, and remember the times others tried to stomp out your light because this will direct you to be kinder and gentler to those you critique. Critique with love and kindness, with teaching and direction. Don’t be the one who unleashes discouragement on others. 

This year of Covid has wreaked havoc on so many. It has filled us with fear and discouragement. Do not fear. Do not fall into the grasp of discouragement. Turn the tables and be the light that shines in the darkness. Besides, you are girded with the armor of God. Wear it all. The. Time!

TWEETABLE

Cindy K. Sproles is an author, speaker, and conference teacher. She is the cofounder of Christian Devotions Ministries and the executive editor for christiandevotions.us and inspireafire.com. Cindy is the lead managing editor for SonRise Devotionals and also Straight Street Books, both imprints of LPC/Iron Stream Media Publications. She is a mentor with Write Right and the director of the Asheville Chrisitan Writers Conference held each February at the Billy Graham Training Center, the Cove, Asheville, NC. Cindy is a best selling, award winning novelist. Visit Cindy at www.cindysproles.com.

17 comments:

  1. I've told this story before, and you mentioning Christians makes it worth mentioning again. I well remember the first time I did paid critiques at the BRMCWC. The writer was new. Within the first 2 pages, I realized she didn't know the guidelines to good writing. I emailed Deb Raney, asking her how do I critique this without discouraging her? She said pick one or two things to focus on.

    So, I went back and read, focusing on show don't tell. Then I was gobsmacked. The end of her story came from so far out in left field, I never saw it coming. What a storyteller! I was so excited, I emailed her. I told her while she still had a ton of work to do to learn the basics, she IS a storyteller. I was so excited to meet her at the conference. And she told me after getting my email, she floated for days! And after we met, she told me she'd bought books on writing I'd recommended on my website and was studying and rewriting with a vengeance.

    There are two ways to put a critique: one kills and the other breathes life into the author.

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    1. Absolutely. You were an amazing encourager. Though there was work needed you gave her the instruction wrapped up in what her strength was. That is great mentoring.

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  2. Thank you for this timely article; encouragement is the food of joy.

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  3. Thanks for the inspiring post, Cindy

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  4. Thanks for your article, Cindy. Once you’ve been blindsided, it’s hard to get back in to the writing lane! Hope you guys are well!

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    1. It does take time to get past. This is why I wrote the article. I'm recovering myself from a nasty review.

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  5. Once when I was harshly critiqued for a poetry submission, another judge counter-balanced it with kind remarks and even said it made her cry. She gave me a high score. The second judge saved the day--and my writing career.

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  6. It only takes a second to see the good.

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  7. Thanks for your encouraging post, Cindy, so well written. Yes, I too have gone through not such pleasant critiques, but after the dust settled, I realized they were helpful. And they made my story read so much better. Thanks again for you article.

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    1. Critiques are hard. We only see perfection in our work when others see with clarity. What is important is receiving things in a gentle and kind way.

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  8. This is such a great post, Cindy. There are many ways we can critique poor writing without being mean. When I meet with a writer whose story is not very good, I say, "This isn't ready to submit to a publisher, but we can work on it." I've been at conferences where "First Page" session were brutal. Attendees laughed, and my heart hurt for the brave writers who volunteered their pages. There needs to be a better way. Thanks for sharing.

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  9. Wonderful article and great advice, Cindy. Thanks for writing it. I don't understand why some people feel it's necessary to be unkind in their critiques. And it's human nature to let those critiques be the ones we remember.

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    1. Exactly. Why the negatives override the positives is beyond me. We tend to remember the bad.

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  10. There is so much to learn about writing and publishing. I learn something new almost every day. Discouragement will come and then, it will leave. I am thankful to know God's timing is best.

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