by Edie Melson @EdieMelson
This isn’t really a post from what I wish had happened, but ways that Kirk has supported me—all without my prompting.
Truthfully, I would not be where I am today without his constant encouragement, prayers, and support.
9 Tips for Supporting Your Writing Spouse
1. Let the writer talk it out with you—even when it makes no sense! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve solved a writing problem just by Kirk listening to me. There’s just something about working through a problem out loud that makes it easier to solve. It’s also so much easier to do when you’re not alone.
2. Share the successes. A big part of the reason I even have
success is because of Kirk’s encouragement and it means so much when he
celebrates with me.
3. Share the successes. No, this isn’t a repeat of the
previous number. I mean shout those successes from the rooftop. When I had an
article published, Kirk was on the phone to his family and friends, bragging
about my success. Now that we’re both on social media, I catch him doing the
same thing, and it means the world to me.
5. Give your spouse the respect he/she deserves. Every
writer is following a dream and more importantly—God's call.That’s a gutsy thing for anyone to do. They
need to be respected for taking a chance and putting it all on the line.
6. Help your writing spouse find the time to write. I don’t
care if your writer spouse is retired or a stay-at-home-mom, finding time to
write is tough. Help them carve it out of the family schedule so they don’t
have to add guilt to the load they’re carrying.
7. Act as a gatekeeper. When I’m on deadline, and even when
I’m not, I have certain times of the day blocked off to write. Kirk fields
phone calls and runs interference for me during those times so I can be free to
work.
8. Help your writing spouse find the money to improve their craft. This
means helping with expenses for conferences, classes and organizations. I used
to worry about spending family money on my dream, but Kirk gave me a different
way to look at it. He told me that neither one of us would begrudge the other
money to go back to college. And he said that was how he viewed my writing
conference expenses. To him, that was my college, and as I became more
successfully, my continuing education credits.
9. Follow your writer spouse’s blog. I don’t care if you
ever comment, but surely you can keep up with what’s being written. This is a
big deal. I talk to writers almost every day who are amazed and just a tad bit
jealous that Kirk follows my blog—without me ever needing to ask him to!
Now I’d like to hear from you. How has your spouse supported
you? How would you like for them to support you?
Don’t forget to join the conversation!
Blessings,
Anne supports me at meetings and book signings by handling book sale $$. More importantly, she skillfully intervenes and rescues me from someone very chatty who is holding up a line.
ReplyDeleteJay Wright; Anderson, SC
You and Anne make a great team!
DeleteI can see Mr. Kirk's debut manuscript coming out of this. Great lessons here.
ReplyDeleteI keep trying to convince him of that! LOL!
DeleteI am very thankful for my husband and his willingness to listen to my story ideas, read my blog posts and always encourage me. :-) He accompanies me to writers conferences and enjoys meeting people.
ReplyDeleteMelissa, that's awesome!
DeleteFor years I did 90% of the house work and yard work. No, he wasn't a bum and watching me do it. He worked crazy long hours and it was my way of supporting him. Now that the kids are adults, and I'm working fulltime and writing, the roles have reversed. I'm super grateful that he does the lion's share of the work without complaining. Especially since I'm currently unpublished.
ReplyDeleteI love the way God works things out. We all have a season!
DeleteI think this is something only the spouse can really understand. Yes, a boyfriend / girlfriend may get a bit of it, but until that intimate marriage relationship comes online, it's really impossible to understand.
ReplyDeleteAlso, Steve is a beta reader for me. I think once a spouse sees the work produced and is invited to become part of the creative process, it's easier for them to support the writer.
ReplyDeleteI am so thankful for my supportive husband--he not only encourages me in all aspects of my writing efforts, but really shares the vision for ministry that Christian writing can be. Really a team effort!
ReplyDelete